David Kotke (aka 'David Rogers') was born in Cudahy Wisconsin, attending Cudahy High School and then studying communications at UW-Parkside, where David was the co-captain of the cheerleading team. After getting a crush on one of his teammates, David heard about JoDee's bar from dormmates, and eventually decided to visit it himself. But before going in, he found a copy of 'In Step' magazine on the street outside the bar, and that opened his eyes to Wisconsin's hidden LGBTQ life.

David first worked for a time at Brunswick Southpark Lanes bowling alley in South Milwaukee. Eventually, David went to 'the big city' (Milwaukee), sat outside La Cage, and finally got the nerve to go inside. He ordered a Coke and stood in the corner. Over time, he became friends with Corey Grubb, Jed Reed, Dennis Wolke and Michael Murphy.

When the Brunswick Southpark bowling alley hosted the 1980 HIT tournament, "ninety-nine percent of the staff was straight, and I was the gay 1%. The staff was warned to be on their best behavior. The owners sent out a memo, 'if you're uncomfortable with gay people, take the Thanksgiving weekend off!' Those who did work made a ton of money and friends."

By 1984, David was living upstairs of LaCage bar, in what is now the Jackie Roberts Show Lounge. At LaCage, he started as a coat checker and worked his way up to bartender. Wednesday nights was Strip Search, run by Steve Reid and his partner Stephen. Steve was a popular stripper from the Circus days, and he was always seeking fresh new talent.

"Samantha Stevens, of the Who's No Lady Revue, was helping Steve promote the show," said David. "She encouraged me to enter the contest." After many tequila shots to work up his nerves, David entered the contest and won $1,000. He was now out full force.

David got involved with Jimmy King Productions, which produced traveling shows throughout Wisconsin. The pageant business was growing in the mid-eighties, and David was a popular contestant. His first win was Mr. Your Place, then Mr. Southeast Wisconsin (with Tiffany Thomas,) and Mr. Fox Valley (with Mandi McCall.) To enter the Mr. and Miss Gay Wisconsin Pageant, you needed a bar title. So, David – as Mr. YP – entered in 1986 and won Mr. Gay Wisconsin (with Erica Stevens.)

But the gay community waas now dealing with AIDS. "Words cannot describe the fear, sadness, and endless devastation AIDS had on our lives," said David. "And yet, it became the new normal. We showed as much love and compassion for our friends as we could... The gay community came together in ways that today's youth just cannot imagine."

In 1986, Rona and Doris Delago invited David to work at the M&M Club. Owner Bob Schmidt liked to hire titleholders, and "David Rogers" was really making a name for himself. So David started working full-time at M&M Club while working weekends at La Cage.

Holly Brown came into David's life and changed it forever. He was invited, alongside Goldie Adams, Vanessa Alexander, and others, to become cast members of a professional cabaret at La Cage. Soon, he was rehearsing and performing every Friday and Saturday instead of bartending. "What a great time in my life I was having with Holly & Company," recalls David. "I was able to work with legends including Mimi Marks, Ginger Spice, Candi Stratton, Vanessa Alexander, B.J. Daniels… the list is endless. We had a blast."

In his personal life, David married Ron Rabehl in 2001. It may not have been legal at the time, but the wedding was real to them. Over three hundred attendees joined David and Ron for a ceremony outside the M&M Club. Sadly, Ron Rabehl passed away on November 23, 2013, at age 52.

Over the years, David has worn all hats in the hospitality business: waiter, host, bartender, manager, and entertainer. He worked at Elsa's for five years in the late 1980s. He is well-remembered as the host of Eagan's on Water, which served the best seafood buffet in the city for over a decade. David spent 10 years at Eagan's as a waiter, bartender, and general manager. When Eagan's closed, David joined the Hudson Business Lounge in the Historic Third Ward. The business closed after seven years due to COVID.

Since 2004, David has been working for Cafe Lulu in Bay View.

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The following profile of David was written by Diane 'Legs' Gregory of the History Project in December 2023 (from which the above bio was created).

David Kotke was born in Cudahy and attended Cudahy High School.

"My parents just wanted a boy and a girl," he said, "but if at first you don't succeed, try try again. Well, they did, and they wound up with four boys! A few years after I came out, my youngest brother also came out of the closet. Of course, my oldest brother found this funny. He'd say, 'Mom and Dad should be happy… two boys and two girls!"

"I wasn't into Tonka trucks, but I got even by hitting him in the head with my GI Joe dolls. My first TV star crush I can remember was Lee Majors from the Six Million Dollar Man series. I was drawn to him and never missed a single episode. My two older brothers felt the same about Lindsay Wagner in Bionic Woman. My brothers used to call me a Fembot! I wound cry, get angry, and toss my dolls again. I have a supportive and loving family. It took a while to gain their understanding and acceptance of my sexuality, but the love was always there. Many tears were shed, and many long conversations were had with my parents to ease their worries and fears. We were dealing with the AIDS crisis, and there was so much unknown about it, and they worried a lot."

"My parents were my mentors- without me even realizing it at the time. I miss their support, wisdom, encouragement, and love. My older brother Alan taught me so much about family-- and being true to yourself no matter what."

"My niece, Alyssa, impressed me so much during her senior year of high school," said David. "She was on the debate team and had to defend her stance of gay marriage. It was a very controversial topic and movement at the time. She asked to interview me on the subject. I will admit I was nervous and hesitant to discuss my sexuality with my teenage niece, but she put my fears and doubts to rest. She explained that several of her friends had gay family members, knew someone who was gay, or were even gay themselves. We had a beautiful, passionate, and educational conversation. And she did amazing on the debate stage!"

Becoming his best self

While studying communications at UW-Parkside, David was the co-captain of the cheerleading team.

"My college cheerleading team consisted of four guys and eight women," said David. "We got to travel throughout the state, as our basketball team competed against the other UW teams. It was a blast – but it was also a physically challenging experience. Lifting women above your head, one-handed, is never that easy. My straight teammates enjoyed it more than I did."

Things got complicated when David developed feelings for one of his straight teammates.

"I didn't truly understand it or acknowledge it, but I did find myself jealous of his girlfriend," said David. "I felt like she was taking him away from our friendship. Sadly, my jealousy ruined that friendship. Things started to build up within me. Within some confusion and a little depression, I was slowly concluding that I was 'probably' gay in the early eighties. There wasn't any LGBTQ support anywhere on campus that I could go to. I didn't feel safe or comfortable talking about it with anyone."

"Coming to terms with one's identity and sexuality is such a personal challenge," said David. "For most people, it's an inner battle to work through."

During a back handspring during a crowded basketball game, David suffered a bad back injury. While he was recovering, his dormmates shared a story about their night out on the town. They'd accidentally found themselves at JoDee's, a nearby gay bar, and they weren't thrilled about it. They stormed out of the bar with disgust.

"As they shared this story, they used the typical slang – 'faggots,' 'queers,' 'sick f*ckers' – all the typically ignorant and uneducated mentality you'd expect from them. But it was all they knew. And I sat there, thinking, great, what if they think I'm gay – or find out that I could be?"

"My insecurities and depression ran wild, but my curiosity and hormones ran wilder. Doing some research, I sought out JoDee's for myself. I took several trips there to scout out the place. I noticed mostly women coming out, and not many men, which was confusing at the time. I didn't even know there were gay bars for men and gay bars for women."

"There was also the fear of being recognized. My dormmates hung out at a bar a few doors down. The fear of being caught was huge. I got the nerve to walk in one day, but as I approached the door, there was a random InStep magazine on the ground outside. I grabbed it and went back to my car. It was so eye-opening. I never knew any of this existed. I was shocked by how normal it seemed. It was like a whole different world. This is where my road trips to the big city of Milwaukee began."

In 1977, David started working at the Brunswick Southpark Lanes bowling alley in South Milwaukee. While he was underage, he was only allowed to serve beer; later, he became one of the bar's most popular mixmasters. He remembers his Brunswick co-workers being an excellent support network when he needed one most. As he started to share himself and become more open to his closest friends, they responded with love and understanding.

"They weren't shocked at all," David said. "It's true that family and friends know you are gay before you do. That love and support helped me become more open. Putting those thoughts and feelings into words made me stronger."

Eventually, David went to the big city, sat outside La Cage, and finally got the nerve to go inside. He ordered a Coke and stood in the corner. He became friends with Corey Grubb, Jed Reed, Dennis Wolke and Michael Murphy.

"There was some harmless flirting with the 'new kid' back then," said David, "but that was just the rite of passage back then. These men helped me learn a lot about myself – including that tequila shots are good for me!"

Corey and Jed became regular customers of David's at the bowling alley, but as he explains it, "they weren't there to bowl."

"Jed and Corey always found it a hoot to visit me and my crazy co-workers at the bowling alley," said David. "They added some flair to a rather redneck establishment. They loved to make as many subtle (and not-so-subtle) references to me being gay, without coming out and saying it. Being gay in public – especially in South Milwaukee – was not a thing back then. You watched yourself, your mannerisms, and your word choices carefully."

"There was one bar in South Milwaukee with a gay bartender. I'm not sure if he knew he was gay yet, but everyone else knew he was. But it didn't matter, because he was a such a great, generous, gracious bartender, that he made everyone feel welcome at the bar. You could let your guard down when he was working. Hickory Inn was one of the only suburban places you could do that in the early 80s."

"Looking back, hosting the 1980 HIT tournament in South Milwaukee was pretty crazy," said David. "Ninety-nine percent of the staff was straight, and I was the gay 1%. The staff was warned to be on their best behavior. The owners sent out a memo, 'if you're uncomfortable with gay people, take the Thanksgiving weekend off!' Those who did work made a ton of money and friends. When it was over, they looked forward to the tournament coming back another year. They all showed respect and compassion to all who attended. We were at the mercy of the AIDS crisis, and there was so much fear and discrimination to endure. All the out-of-state participants praised the event, because Wisconsin was one of the first states passing laws supporting the LGBTQ community at the time."

His grades began to suffer, he lost his cheerleading position, and he left the university. But David knew he had found his home.

Top of the world

By 1984, David was living upstairs in what is now the Jackie Roberts Show Lounge. He started as a coat checker and worked his way up to bartender. Wednesday nights was Strip Search, run by Steve Reid and his partner Stephen. Steve was a popular stripper from the Circus days, and he was always seeking fresh new talent.

"Samantha Stevens, of the Who's No Lady Revue, was helping Steve promote the show," said David. "She encouraged me to enter the contest, but I was still so unsure of myself. This was a real turning point for me!"

After many tequila shots to work up his nerves, David entered the contest and won $1,000. He was now out full force.

"A year later, Patti Cakes and I co-hosted a similar show named 'Strut Your Stuff," said David. "All of those doubts were now replaced by confidence in myself."

David got involved with Jimmy King Productions, which produced traveling shows throughout Wisconsin. The pageant business was growing in the mid-eighties, and David was a popular contestant. His first win was Mr. Your Place, then Mr. Southeast Wisconsin (with Tiffany Thomas,) and Mr. Fox Valley (with Mandi McCall.) To enter the Mr. and Miss Gay Wisconsin Pageant, you needed a bar title. So, David – as Mr. YP – entered in 1986 and won Mr. Gay Wisconsin (with Erica Stevens.) When Erica moved to California soon afterwards, Tina Capri (first runner-up) received the title.

"I was blessed to have won Mr. Gay Wisconsin in 1986," said David. "It was a fantastic opportunity to represent the community, both locally and throughout the state and country. I was young, and I was in my 'we're here, we're queer, get used to it' rebel phase. I would co-host fundraisers, rallies, and community gatherings everywhere, with the honor of introducing keynote speakers like Dr. Karen Lamb, Senator Tammy Baldwin, Jamakaya, Miriam Ben-Shalom, and Governor Tony Earl."

"Promoting safe sex was also the new norm, along with condoms," said David. "While I was in Tennessee competing for Mr. Gay USA, I learned that my friend Christopher had died from AIDS. I had to sit through an interview, with six judges around a round table, while sad and nervous at the same time. One of the judges tossed a condom across the table at me and said, 'what does this mean to the gay community?' My eyes teared up, I took a deep breath, and I said, 'it means hope – hope to prevent the spread of AIDS, hope to slow the death rate while a vaccine/cure is being developed, and hope that condoms will promote education and awareness across all communities, gay or straight.' The judges all had tears in their eyes. I got so many hugs that day. I didn't win the overall title but won the highest score on the interview. That was more important to me then and now. Acknowledging my own feelings and ideals has made my inner self so much stronger."

Tragedy and triumph in the turbulent 80s

"AIDS was a death sentence for my generation," said David. "It was an upward battle with no end or cure in sight. We lost so many amazing and wonderful people far too soon."

"Words cannot describe the fear, sadness, and endless devastation AIDS had on our lives," said David. "And yet, it became the new normal. We showed as much love and compassion for our friends as we could. The government was not providing any help of any kind. We had to do it all ourselves. The gay community came together in ways that today's youth just cannot imagine. We hosted endless fundraising events. We founded our own AIDS resource center and support groups. We fought back with anything we and everything we had available to us."

"I remember one especially hard conversation with my mother," said David. "After visiting my parents for dinner, I told my mother I had to leave soon because I had a funeral to go to. She questioned that because I'd just been to a funeral the week before. She started to cry, saying I had already been to more funerals at my age than she'd attended in her whole life. Sadly, that was the reality of AIDS. It was heartbreaking for everyone. You watched your friends become sick, knowing there was no hope and little time left for them, and that you'd be attending another funeral soon."

To make matters worse, the LGBTQ community was also facing other battles at the same time. Ignorance, hatred, discrimination, and pure evil were rampant.

"Restaurant workers would wear white gloves to avoid 'catching' something from you," said David. "Family members would refuse hugs out of fear of AIDS. Religious conservatives laughed at the 'gay disease' and praised the end of the gay community. There was so much hate, and in some ways, it has never gone away. Look at the current political climate!"

"People's minds started to open when AIDS affected someone they knew," said David. "When we started losing people we loved, gay or straight, media and health officials started to change their approach. They started saying things like 'You can't get AIDS from a hug.' That simple action of love and kindness meant more to the afflicted than we can ever imagine. AIDS does not discriminate. It doesn't care about your age, gender, religion, or sexual identity. It was hard for me to experience coming out and joining a community with all this tremendous loss happening at the same time. There was so much death, and so little information, leaving us all so confused. But we were strong – and we did what we could – to support each other to survive."

Becoming David Rogers

In 1986, Rona and Doris Delago invited David to work at the M&M Club. Owner Bob Schmidt liked to hire titleholders, and "David Rogers" was really making a name for himself. He started working full-time at M&M Club while working weekends at La Cage.

Holly Brown came into David's life and changed it forever. He was invited, alongside Goldie Adams, Vanessa Alexander, and others, to become cast members of a professional cabaret at La Cage. Soon, he was rehearsing and performing every Friday and Saturday instead of bartending.

"What a great time in my life I was having with Holly & Company," said David. "I was able to work with legends including Mimi Marks, Ginger Spice, Candi Stratton, Vanessa Alexander, B.J. Daniels… the list is endless. We had a blast whenever we performed. As much fun as it was to put on the cabaret show, twice a week at La Cage, it was also a lot of work. We were our own stage and lighting hands, putting the stage together and then taking it down right afterwards, so that DJ Tonya could use the space for Dance, Dance, dance. We 'adopted' Jackie Roberts, Sasha Mitchell, and Rudi D'Angelo to operate the spotlight when they were young and just coming out. When a cast member needed an extra back-up dancer, we often grabbed one of them to get on stage, leaving us without a light person. Those three would go on to become top performers and legends."

"My parents attended the shows often, and my brother occasionally showed up," said David. "They loved Holly. I had come a long way in earning their acceptance, so the shows were always exciting and emotional times."

"I considered Holly to be a mentor," said David. "Her professionalism was exceptional. But what really stood out was her generosity of herself and her heart to each one of us. She allowed everyone to shine as an individual. Egos were left at the door. When a backup was needed, cast members would step up."

"I have many fond memories of the years I shared with Holly and Company. Shows today are mostly solo acts – they're missing the relationships created while working together. Our production numbers strived to be top notch entertainment. Now it's just one number after another, but there's no sense of unity."

"My favorite memory was the show introducing Mimi Marks to the cast," said David. "She had been working at Club 219, making a name for herself, and showing off her incredible beauty and talent. Holly convinced her to join us, and while we tried to keep it a secret, word was spreading about our 'special guest star.' That night was a sold-out show. Both sides of the bar were packed. People were watching the show on overhead monitors because they couldn't get near the stage. We built production numbers around Mimi, and she truly shined that night as the true highlight of the show. During curtain call, Holly introduced us all, except Mimi. Holly then asked us to welcome our special guests in the audience: Mimi's parents and family. They had never seen Mimi perform before. Her dad got up, came to the stage, and gave Mimi a huge hug. There wasn't a dry eye in the house."

"That was the magical beauty of Holly & Company. We not only entertained you, but we also went straight for your heart. It was always about the love."

Mastering the art of service

Over the years, David has worn all hats in the hospitality business: waiter, host, bartender, manager, and entertainer.

David worked at Elsa's for five years in the late 1980s. He is well-remembered as the host of Eagan's on Water, which served the best seafood buffet in the city for over a decade. David spent 10 years at Eagan's as a waiter, bartender, and general manager. When Eagan's closed, David joined the Hudson Business Lounge in the Historic Third Ward. The business closed after seven years due to COVID. Since 2004, David has been working for Café Lulu in Bay View.

David reflects on his career mentors, including Raffy Marion from Brunswick Southpark Lanes, Bob Schmidt from the M&M Club, Karl Kopp from Elsa's, Billy "Blonde Lightning" Eagan from Eagan's on Water, and Zach Schnitzler from Café Lulu.

"They, in so many ways, developed and crafted my service industry career," said David. "They taught me how to anticipate needs, demonstrate patience, and master the art of fine details. They taught me the importance of truly showing up for your job, even when life is throwing you obstacles to work through. Hopefully, I've done them all proud over these many years in the business."

What the world needs now

David married Ron Rabehl in 2001. It may not have been legal at the time, but the wedding was real to them. Over three hundred attendees joined David and Ron for a ceremony outside the M&M Club. The six flower girls were Sasha Mitchell, Joey Black, Nova Divine, Jackie Roberts, Christina Chase, and Rudi D'Angelo. The song of the event was "What the World Needs Now."

"We wanted to celebrate our love with friends," said David. "It was right after 9/11 when things felt so scary and uncertain. What was certain was that we loved each other wholeheartedly."

Sadly, Ron Rabehl passed away on November 23, 2013, at age 52.

Reflecting on his younger years, David is concerned with a lack of respect for our history.

"I listened, laughed, and learned from the previous generations," said David. "Their relationships guided him through some difficult times in the gay community."

"It could just be me, and I am in my 60s now, but I don't feel a strong sense of community within the younger generations," said David. "I am sure the generation before mine thought the same. They had Stonewall. They had gay liberation. These things brought them together with a shared sense of unity. AIDS brought my generation together, for better and for worse. I just don't feel there's anything unifying the community today. Bars are not the connectors they used to be. Shows are not the connectors they used to be. There is so much more acceptance on the surface, but that acceptance is deceiving when you consider the politics we are up against."

"I believe that good people attract good people," said David. "My friendships prove to me that this is true. Be kind, communicate and be grateful. If I could end on one thing: share. Share a hug, smile, hello, goodbye. Share compassion, patience, and understanding. Most importantly, share love. Love is what the world needs now and always."